discoveringmytruehome

It’s been almost two weeks since I made a trip to my childhood hometown in Akure, Ondo State, Nigeria.

And while it did evoke so many treasured memories of the good old days. It left me for the first time with the uncomfortable feeling that I had finally come to bid farewell to a place that meant so much to my family and me.

I have never felt this way the previous times we visited since we first bade Akure goodbye in August 1997 as we left for our Second Missionary journey to Zambia.

During my several visits to Akure in the intervening years, I always felt like I was coming back home. There are still people from my childhood who love and remember me.

I had a wonderful childhood growing up in Akure. It took a village to raise me to become the woman I am today—neighbours who became family members.

So why was this trip so different? I think it is complex. But I believe that on this trip, the change I felt was both internal and external, and it was a shock to my system.

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The purpose of the trip was to attend my best friend’s younger sister’s wedding. Seeing the bride’s father walk his last child down the aisle hit me deeply. I remember the new bride’s birth and how excited we all were. Now getting to see her married sent an internal message; the times had changed. Things will never be the same again.

The house I grew up in no longer exists. It was torn down years ago and replaced with a prominent stately structure. Yet the street always still felt like home. This time it felt so foreign, maybe because it was tarred or because I had outgrown it.

The elders are also growing older and dying. So there is that sense of loss. Also, my generation has since left for greener pastures within and outside Nigeria.

That is what I believe makes a difference. So although I bid goodbye to my childhood home. I can’t completely erase my footprints from there. I am Bethany Chijindu, Mr and Mrs Emmanuel and Mabel’s daughter. And my heart will always still call Akure my childhood home.

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This begs the question of what makes a home, the place itself or the people with whom you share space.

In my experience, it is a mixture of the two.

I am glad I got to go home and meet family and old friends and witness a joyful occasion. I was again reminded how love goes beyond blood, culture and borders.

One of the fantastic things that happened at the reception was hearing a group of young people who now belonged to the Bible club I belonged to sing songs I grew up singing taught to us by the Brides mother.

Entering A New Phase

As I enter my 40th year, I feel like I am entering a new phase of my life. One in which I will get married and raise a family. I have no idea where my home will be.

Knowing the trajectory of my life, it could be in Tanzania, India, or Sierra Leone. In other words, the world is wide open, and I go where God orders my footstep.

But I know it will be one filled with love, just like my parents gave me in Akure, Ndola, and Nairobi.

Maybe one day I will come back home to show my children where Mummy grew up. Until then, it’s time to focus on the future and what it holds for me.